How to Behave Like a Proper Old Lady

This is a continuation of a blog I wrote the other day. I thought of a few more things that should be pointed out. First of all, I heard of a skirt allegedly walking up into a club meeting and demanding to be taken home this past weekend. Now, I am the first to admit I will accidentally walk up on men talking sometimes because I am deaf. When this happens I quickly turn away so as not to overhear anything being said. Most of the men in my circle know that I cannot hear so I own being a little lax in the stay far away from talks. However… as a general rule, if your man, any man, is in a conversation with another biker, regardless of whether its 29 degrees and pouring rain and locusts are eating your purse, you sit the fuck where he told you to sit until he gets through whatever he is conversing about. It doesn’t matter if its club business or if they are discussing a blister on someone’s dick, know your place. Sit your ass down and shut your ass up til he is done. Talk to the other women or play with your phone or scratch your ass, but do not under any circumstances disturb them. If they decide they want to have a meeting in the ladies room and you just ate a mess of collard greens and a glass of prune juice, well, either go find a rock or a tree or shit your britches or take your chances in the men’s room. Do Not. Interrupt. The. Men. Women should be seen and not heard. if you ARE heard, you need to be heard laughing and joking and being a good girl. not pissing and moaning about your husband or kids, not complaining because you don’t want to be there, and not gossiping and stirring shit. You are an example of the club because they have done you the honor of allowing you to be there. Fucking act like it. Show some manners. Don’t sit around all spread eagled and nasty and slutty. Don’t get drunk and embarrass your man. Don’t cry in public for anything less than death or pain. Don’t get methed out and sit around tweeking and geeking like an idiot chewing your jaw. Fucking maintain. Do not make eyes at or hit on other men. Do not make snarky remarks about women who are there with the other men. It is not any of your business. I heard this particular female I mentioned discuss at length how she chewed on some patchwearer’s asses for discussing women they wanted to have carnal knowledge of in front of her because she knows their wives. She is lucky she didn’t get anything from her face slapped off to butt fucked a couple times in the parking lot. If those men wanted to perform oral sex on a hooker on the table in front of her, she is to sit there and keep her fucking mouth shut about it. it is not her business. What happens in the club stays in the club. She is not to go yapping to his ol lady either. I also can’t believe i have to say this part, but you also need to make sure you wash your fucking ass. How do some of you seriously go out in public looking the way you do? There is absolutely no reason not to wash your hair, wear clean clothes… be respectful. If you got some sagging ugly ass tits, wear a bra. Don’t nobody wanna see that. Put on some make up. Wash yourself and wear deodorant.. nobody wants to hug a stanking woman.. much less sit beside one all night. Don’t go around looking like you just got off work at the gas station… try to be something your man can be proud of. If you ride your own scooter, take care of that motherfucker. the reflection in your chrome is a direct reflection on your man. If you aren’t a great rider, practice until you are or get on a bitch seat. Ride your ass at the back of the pack like you are supposed to. You have absolutely no place riding up in the patchwearers, no matter who your husband is. Show some common club respect… Don’t go in to events and fill up three plates of food for yourself. This first of all looks slovenly and gross. Second of all, make sure there is enough food for the men even if you don’t get to eat. Do not ever eat before a patchwearer for any reason unless you are told to. Do not complain about what you are given to eat. You don’t get to make those decisions. The men want Mexican food, we eat mexican food. you dont have to be subservient to be fucking respectful. those men EARNED those patches just like soldiers earn stripes in the military. you didn’t earn shit. you are wearing a privilege, not a right. nobody owes you a damned thing so quit acting like they do and be appreciative that they allow you in their world. Don’t get on facebook and tell lies about how rich your man is if he isn’t. If you sit around posting lies all the time, then it makes it look like he isn’t providing for you when you show up looking like a fucking swamp rat. Everyone knows the truth and all you do is make yourself look like a pretentious cunt. Be honest about your life, whatever that life might be. ~ Amy White, The Wicked Bitch

 

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